“Confusion” by Julian Klibor, Creative Commons license, Flickr

Trust is fragile. Experience demonstrates that a bond of trust, once broken generally makes re-establishing a relationship tougher. The challenge is to identify those behaviors and attitudes to avoid that can fracture the bond of trust. These examples are generally pretty obvious, yet happen far too often:

The Lexicon of Trust Busters – Part V

1.  Underrate Negative Emotion:  The more we adversely affect others’ perceptions, lifestyles, or expectations in negative ways, the more likely they are to react emotionally and negatively.  The relationship of trust can mitigate only so much potential damage from negative circumstances.

2.  Overrate Your Preparation:  One serious threat to trust is the assumption of being adequately prepared to manage adverse situations that can negatively affect others. Leaders are notoriously over-optimistic about readiness.

3. Self-Forgiveness:  Self-talk designed to ignore reality.  Symptoms of self-forgiveness include self-serving phrases like “Mistakes can happen, even to the best companies.”  “We’ve been paying taxes in this community for decades.”  “I didn’t know what was going on.”  “No one told me.”  “We’re only human.”  “People make mistakes.”  Self-forgiveness destroys trust.

4. Victim Confusion:  An irritable reaction to reporters, employees, angry neighbors, and victims’ families when they call asking for help, information, explanation or apology they get: “We’ve been a good corporate citizen,” “We’ve contributed to the opera, the little league, the shelter program,” and “We don’t deserve to be treated badly.” “Hey!  We’re victims, too.” These behaviors are an attack on the credibility and honesty of real victims. It’s very accusatory and destructive.

James E. Lukaszewski, ABC, Fellow IABC; APR, Fellow PRSA, BEPS Emeritus

If you have questions, or would like to dive more deeply into the subject of this blog, you can reach me 24/7 at jel@e911.com; 203-948-7029 (voicemail, email, text). I look forward, as a friend and colleague, to helping you achieve the objectives you’ve set for yourself for having a happier, more influential, successful and meaningful career.

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